Good day,

This is the dirtiest / skidliest hostel I ever stayed at in Asia. It was in Vientiane, Laos. Not really setup for backpackers, hotels were $50US each and I found this “gem”. It felt like I was in the movie fight club aka squatting in an old abandon building.

Funny how you then get to Europe and if you don’t look for a hostel you just may end up at some hotel which is also skidly for 60E, ha. For some reason though spending $50us a night on a hotel room in Laos was just well, mind blowing. If you just arrived maybe but if you’ve been in SE Asia for a while, you’ll know where I’m coming from.

Turns out, ran into some awesome people and had a great time. Oddly enough, it also had WIFI, go figure? The staff was relatively nice and it was in a dumpy part of town. Vientiane is not so much a tourist town but it is definitely developing.

Tips hat,

P.S: Don’t forget that 1st Class Eurail Pass if you’re going to Europe, it’s free.

Search du jour?!: “fishing in laos” – Search.

Good day,

Not so long ago, while I was busy not “having a boring life”, aka before I fractured my face. I was in Luang Prabang. It’s actually very similar to Hoi An, only in Luang Prabang, Laos, you have monks, here you have tailors. Luang Prabang is also home of some tasty Snake Cobra Whiskey, indeed it is. I also spent a long time there. I really like these wonderfully weird places where you feel like you’re in a Dr. Who episode.

Chum or Tom, not sure how you pronounce his name, makes some MEAN Mekong moonshine. Very mean, very intense and very strong like the sign suggests. After I drank it, I threw a mini-cooper into the Mekong, sadly my camera battery died. If you’re into strangely strong drinks and don’t mind risking your life drinking a plethora of poisonous things you’d never want to encounter in the wilderness, I suggest you visit him and “give it a shot”. It has cobra, other snakes, scorpions, weird centipedes, all sorts of creepy crawlers. Basically anything that is poisonous, he finds and crams into these jugs and lets them ferment, hmmm…

Describing the drink as “intense” is an understatement and tastes like nothing you’ve ever had before. (duh!!) I had this a few more times with various different people, it really burns. I suggest you sip it slowly instead of just down it. Then again, that would be kinda boring and painful so there we are. There was this dutch dude who was like 50 who says he has one every night, I give him a formal hat tip where I actually take the hat off, a sign of true respect and admiration.

As for today, I did nothing except drink sugarcane, water and visit my “lunch lady” and sleep, snore.

Ahh, Luang Prabang is a great place, I highly recommend you visit there if you’re in Northern Thailand and thinking of going into Laos, that or if you’re in Laos, make the trip, it’s a time warp. Looking through my external hard drive of video and photos, when I return home this summer and DON’T BLOG about how I’m fishing and golfing, I’ll have daily photos / videos and other things you will probably find interesting.

I am aware I said Thailand Whiskey when it’s Laos Whiskey, whatever.

Tips Hat,

P.S: I sure have ingested a lot of Cobra on this trip, I kinda feel like “Cobra Commander”. Truth be told, he was always my favorite G.I Joe character and G.I Joe’s were always my favorite toys. What is with the new toys that don’t have bending knee and elbow joints, you can’t have good “wars” without it, man Mattel needs a shot of Mekong Moonshine, STAT!

Good day,

Check it, I leave the slum of a guest house and hit the streets looking for good times and eats. Cruise to the bus station, meet these dudes, show them where to get tickets, bus comes. They say “that our bus” I say nah and just chill. Turns out it is our bus, thanks guys.

Get in, totally loaded with mosiqutos so I wait outside, board last. I am sitting next to a monk. We start chatting, one thing leads to another, start talking about meditating aka “mental purification”. This Buddhist monk was born in Laos but lived in Canada most of his life, Montreal to be exact.

Suffice to say when we finally get through all the border crossings he says “want to come to our temple and learn to meditate?” I said “Sure”.

We take a tuk tuk to one of the NICEST wat’s I’ve ever seen. I’m staying in my own bungalow surrounded by other ones similar that house monks who have been in the program ~1-4 years and meditate 20 hours a day, sleep 4 hours a day and eat once. They only eat what villagers bring them. This place is very different.

I’m sleeping on the floor in this 12×12 ft room with a barrel for a shower. I arrive and he says I will come get you in a few hours. When they say “few hours” they mean few hours. Then we talk about this and that until I’m like “so how do you meditate” I got an idea and tried it, at first I’m like wow this is boring but I had nothing else to do. I mean I’m in this small room, no where to go, nothing else to do… I was jonesing for a smoke, a coke, a bite to eat, a conversation, anything but nothing, just stillness everywhere.

I remember him saying “When alone becareful of your thoughts, when with friends becareful of your words”. That’s really true when left alone with your thoughts and nothing else.

At 4 am I woke up like “WTF is that noise” and was like “Wow, I’m in a monestary, this is something new”. This monk was watering his lawn and showering with a hose. These guys meditate 20 hours a day and keep much different hours than say an average 9-5er. I’m almost like “how did I end up here!?”

After a while I don’t know but all these images start coming up and it was a most interesting / lonely / long / soul searching night. I’m welcome to stay as long as I want, may stay a few more days unless…

I DON’T GET MY VACCINE THING STRAIGTENED OUT! ERGH!! I go to 3 hospitals today, first one I’m like “no way”, next one I”m like “OK” and the guy is like “sorry, we only have verorab, you SHOULD be taking Rabipur”… Really? EVERYONE else says it’s ok and I even have one 1 verorab in the mix. Now I’m en route to the next hospital. Getting annjoyed and wishing I wore some Nike Air’s instead of flip flops.

Found this internet cafe as I had some work to do for my web business and now updating you here. I’ll either find a vaccine here or I need to bounce tomorrow.

Just yesterday I was like “maybe in Tibet I’ll go meditate with monks” now I got invited to their wat and I’m living like a 2 year + monks who just meditate, I’ve never thought so much and blocked so many thoughts, my mind is expanding, I like it.

To think, just 2 days ago I was writing how traveling was getting boring!

In the event that I stay with the monks(I can’t believe I’m staying with monks), I won’t be updating. If I didn’t have to go get these vaccines I wouldn’t have left, it’s a mission outside the city. In Nongkhai, Thailand on the border of Laos. Then again, I may make the trek, I like to get out and about, you know.

Tips hat,

Going to Thailand, either Bangkok or Udon Thani or Tani or something of that nature. The hospitals are mad basic here and the clinic for Aussies is also basic. Supposedly if you get mangled over here and need medical treatment, AEK International in Udon is the “place to be”.

I do want to go to Bangkok for several reasons but I fear what will happen if I do, I’ve been there 3 weeks, I’ll get stuck again, attacked by a gang of rabid dogs set to destroy my trip or just get lost in a sea of dreadlocks and dreadful tattoos.

Who knows but right now, I’m checking out of the “King Suite” in the “Hotel of Squalor” in Vientiane and bouncing, in true SHABL form. I’m going to walk to a bus station and find out what is going where, when etc…

Tips hat,

P.S I Have like 75,000K left on me, I do NOT want to hit a bank machine and changing KIP into Baht in Thailand is almost laughable.

P.P.S I will miss Laos, coming to Asia? Add Laos to your list, you’ll like it here.

I write this to you sweating on a pink flowered bed of nails on a hot iron frame. Dirty spider webs in the corners of the cracked and paint chipping walls. Windows so dirty they could be used as retro bathroom windows with mildew growing from all corners. Doors that don’t lock and floors that have never been washed with lingering smells that could never be described. I’m living a dive of a hostel which feels more like squatting than anything else. On the topic of squatting, world’s worst squat toilet.

This place feels like Fight Club, if you’ve ever seen the movie you’ll remember the home they squat in, this place is like straight from that street only some people “tidied” it up slightly, just enough to be able to sell it to weary and forgone foreign travelers nonchalant about hygiene. I found this place yesterday, random and thought to myself “what a dump”.

I scanned for bedbugs and couldn’t find any but thought there has to be some here. For some reason I didn’t leave, instead I surrendered and thought to myself “let’s see what it’s like to live in total and complete squalor” just for the fun it. Just to expand my comfort zone and experience what life is like for some people, less fortunate of course. Unless this is your thing,  I’ve heard of hippies with bank accounts bigger than their bags who squat in dumps simply because they don’t notice the filth and they like the price. Think dreadful tattoos and dread locks that smell like dumpsters. Oddly enough, simplification is a key component of wealth accumulation. It’s treu(sic)

I digress.

Traveling is getting #%$ING BORING and I need to do something, anything to feel a sense of adventure again. When I did the ropes tubing, I back flipped them both times because I could and everyone else just held on like they were on maddeningly predictable merry-go-rounds as methodically mundane as a less than majestic marriage ceremony for a couple who simply isn’t going to make it and provides a lackluster menu.

I digress, yet again.

This place is 3 floors of filth and fecal matter. I say that because the toilets are like normal toilets but with no seats. If you’re going to make your “less than distinguished guests” hover over something, give them some leverage man!? It’s arguably the worst of all worlds. Also, no toilet paper so just a barrel of disease water. Also, the floor is always wet, but is it water or is it?! I’ll have you know I’ve been going to this “Treu Coffee” place, it’s fruity in a why would people pay what I’m paying for rent for a stale baguette but whatever. Besides buying a crap coffee this morning, I’ve just been walking in and going straight the bathroom while avoiding eye contact with the workers, then being all smiles and salutations on the way out. They don’t seem to care.

First 20 minutes here, I adventure into the dorm, never been in a dorm really and most certainly have never slept in one.  I tip my hat (only slightly, so indistinguishable it may of even just looked like a simple nod of acknowledgment) and said good day to you. The group replied “most magnificent, thank you for asking kind sir” while this guy who is half Spanish / French replied “muy magnific mon amigo”. I quipped in my best Canadian accent “This place is a dump, eh?” to which they replied of course and the lady started showing me some bed bugs. This kinda freaked this gent. I inquired and no one else got them and it was in a different dorm but in the same building. Anyways this should have been a warning bell but I decided to stay.

I had a single room which is same price as a double. The single is 1/3 the size, no windows and just kinda like, picture a shed your dad built when you were growing up somewhere, the guys here refer to it as “the hole”. It had no frame, just a really thin piece of foam on the floor and a fan, on the floor next to you. No windows except a big hole with a screen near the ceiling near the hall with a bright light that steals dreams.

There is no division between buildings here, they all just end with the roof higher so in theory you could climb (after getting a tetanus shot) up part of the walls and over into the neighboring buildings and them into yours. The stair case is so steep it should have warning signs and a safety net. I assure you the path the stairs take were NOT in the original blue print. When standing on the top or bottom floor and looking up it’s something else. It kinda reminds me off a really big tree fort you’d build as a kid, no real rhythm or reason just build and that be the path type of thing. Furthermore, the power in our room for the fans and lights isintermitent, electricity is a privledge, when is the last time you thought of that?

It’s weird but after spending the majority of the day just going in and out of consciousness on this uncomfortable bed in what could best be described a “Sh!t hole”, I don’t really mind it here.  Right now I’m writing this while checking some stocks and they are playing a game of chess. Later I’ll go eat dinner somewhere for a buck and probably have a drink. If you’re sleeping in squalor like a bum, a slight buzz is a must I believe?

Conclusions? I have none, I’m just sweating in a crappy place for a day or two and get this, it has access to a free unsecure wifi connection from somewhere. Tonight I’m paying 25,000k a night to stay in this spacious triple slum with 2 guys I met from New York last night. Actually, my conclusion is that an  internet connection is more important to my happiness than any creature comforts and if you’ve never slept in squalor, try it sometime, it’s kinda fun.

Tips hat,

<Downs expresso with a great vigor and zeal and slams the tiny cup on a hand crafted hardwood coffee table.> I woke up yesterday after what was a total bender of a tubing experience and decided to bounce. I sweat buckets (literally) on a bus for 6 hours and at one point hit a bump, my knee dug into this nail on the seat in front. Get this, it hit right bullseye on my old staph infection, wtf!?

Took the local bus from Vang Vieng to Vientiane for a mere 30,000 kip, it took a while and was really hot but whatever. I’m over VIP buses, minibuses etc. You meet lame people. Met some guys who have worked in Vang Vieng for 1-2 years, they look tired but happy with themselves.

I’m in Vientiane, the capital of Laos drinking coffee and chilling. This place is cool. Had dinner on the Mekong last night and watched a sunset. Had a great meal, met a girl from France and she joined me with this photo journalist. In front of us was an awkward German and a lady boy who was a wrestler in a previous life, to my left? Some dude who graduated from the same SMALL University in rural Quebec as myself hahaha. It’s a small world, he graduated in 1973, myself? Class of 2003.

Getting injections in Vientiane is no problemo… They got mad luxury rides here and business men banking coin. You think they get crap care? No way. Over heard a business man saying he lived here 9 years, I went over to the table and said “pardon the interuption but…” he filled me in. Checking out the Australian Consulate as they help Canadians as well. It’s really $$$ but you know what you’re getting, also this way I can cruise south into Cambodia, then Vietnam just keep going, keep on trucking like my boy CMI.

Last night, I ran into a whole new crew, like I do every day. Some guy on my facebook was like “yo Rob, are you bored traveling alone yet?”. Hmmm NO!? Traveling alone is the ultimate sense of adventure, unknown and excitement if you have the guts and funds to make it work. Remember, no drama, it’s your trip, you meet a crew and get along? That’s all you need to worry about. Being gregarious and slightly nefarious at times is a great combo.

Anyways, I’m going to hang out here today, might even go back to Vang Vieng. When I got to Ventiane I was like … I feel like smashing a mirror on my face then carving WEAK into my chest before sterilizing it with a half used urinal cake for leaving soo soon. I wanted to make sure I could get the injection here and if I couldn’t, I’d have to leave like today or tomorrow to Bangkok. Give yourself some time in Veng Vieng, it’s a special place for anyone who is cool and under 30. Over 30, sure just I hope you look young as you’ll be old man on the river, ha.

Alas, who knows but I miss tubing, I’d love to be watching family guy, eating a huge breakfast then just meet mad randoms and chill in a river drinking cheap whiskey, indeed. On a side note, I woke up early after going to bed late. Chilling with some new friends from New York and we hear this crazy local music BLASTING like BOOM BOOM BOUNCE… BOOM BOOM BOUNCE…

We decided to rock the spot or something like that, it’s this family doing karaoke and blaring it into the street so we join them and their feast doing shots of whisky before jumping in a tuk tuk to some discoteque, the discoteque sucked and that was pretty much the rest of the evening. The stuff the drivers off you here is hilarious, you’re like wow bro, no holding back just going for the home run are we? I came to chase some drinks, not the dragon thanks.

Alright, I’ve written enough timely and arguably relevant crap for this day.

Tips hat,

P.S: I want to buy some suits and tuxedos very soon, maybe Vietnam?

Top of the morning,

Tubing in Vang Vieng, Laos is arguably one of the coolest things you can ever do in your life. I’m not saying move here and never leave, I’m saying come here and go tubing in what can only be described as a chillers paradise. When you first get there you’re like, WOW this place is out of control. Couldn’t find any cool videos on youtube, probably because most people dont bring anything except a swim suit and a smile. The video above gives you an idea.

Picture this, sun is shining, bikini clad babes and cool guys every where on these jungle gym aparatuses spread out all over the river. People floating in tubes with buckets of whiskey, chugging beers, dancing at one of the many bars. When you first get there and you look down the river, your eyes light up and you’re like “I BELIEVE THE HYPE”.  I had heard of tubing but never even googled it so it was all just a really pleasant surprise.

It will probably cost you ~10,000kip if you split a tuk tuk with people to get there. It’s free to enter. Drinks are MOST expensive at the first bar, bar 3 which is pretty big had buckets for 30,000 kip, the first bar? They wanted 80,000 kip. The zip lines are nuts, especially if you hold on until the end because it sends you into a weird corkscrew 900 or something as you fall 20 feet into this river.  Most bars just give away free shots of whisky. I started on beer and moved over. One guy was drinking straight vodka, not a good long term plan I don’t think.

The ropes? Out of this world. Lots of bruised ribs from improper entry into the water, these things are HIGH up there. Stuff like this in the Western world? It would never operate or be shut down in seconds. It’s awesome but you gotta be safe. When I first got there and did the big one at #1, I was slightly like woah, this is messed up.  On the way home we crammed 25 people onto this big 10 man tuk tuk, even had 10 on the roof. The guy was like “ok this is ridiculous”, everybody out!

I will say in order to be safe… NEVER EVER DIVE, I can’t believe some people do. Also the most dangerous part of the swings is dropping in and coming back, people hold on and then are too chicken to let go so they hold on as it comes back to the launching pad. If you let go there… Good luck.

People doing all sorts of crazy stuff like holding onto the ropes with their legs, body painting, writing email addresses & obsceneities  on each others bodies, spray painting themselves, everything, it was literally like this big booze fueled jungle gym for those who dared to make the trek. If you’re in the area, you need to come do this. I think 1 day is plenty, other people stay here a few days and do it a few times.  Others stay here for months, ha.

The water is clear and refreshing with a nice current to bring you from bar to bar. There is this massive slide near the bottom of the bar area. Met a guy who mangled his back on it and was like “it’s ok, I just landed wrong”. Not sure if I would of tried it or not, as I said, I never made it past bar 3. Didn’t bother buying a tube either which proved to be a most wise decision.

Don’t bring ANYTHING except money and your room key, it will get lost or misplaced or whatever, it is a sick party and you don’t want to worry about things as you’re jumping in and out of this river and just having the time of your life. I mean nothing, no flip flops, nothing, you will lose them. The tube is more of a hassle then it’s worth. I stayed until the music stopped playing, well past 6, had I had a tube I’d have to baby sit it and return it, not worth it.

The tubing is a unique experience that I’m SURE anyone who has ever gone would agree is totally out of this world. Good news? It’s not out of this world, just get your game together and take a trip to Lao PDR in South East Asia. Average age? 18-30 ok 18-25 haha. If you don’t get out of your mind, and use some common sense, you’ll have the time of your life. Just not the place to get too wreckless or play the hero, ok? Got it? Good.

On a side note, you hear people talking about a bar that only plays Family Guy… It’s true, I’m off to grab some breakfast there now. It’s right near the main drag, can’t miss it.

Tips hat,

P.S: Might go to Vientiene (sp?) the capital this afternoon, that or leave direct from here tomorrow. I’d LOVE to stay here a few more days but I can’t. I will say it again, having a “timeline” on a trip sucks the life out of it and pulls you in directions you don’t want to go. Kinda like some other things in life I can think of but won’t mention at this time.

The sun is shining and Vang Vieng, Laos is a ghost town at 11AM, 11PM? This place is POPPING! So I came here and like ok this place is seedy, party town, boring blah, let’s just get one thing straight… If you hear me hating on something and I mention in the same update that I’m sick, that’s probably why. EVERYTHING SUCKS when you’re sick. I remember having the worst throat infection in Panama. I was in heaven but felt like I was in hell.

I digress.

So this place “Vang Vieng” in the middle of Laos goes off the hook at night, seriously. I went for a leisurely jaunt for some wifi, had to spend 15,000K so I had a few beers, the internet connection sucked. I then thought I heard “free buckets” and went to inquire. It’s a SMALL world. These 2 Spanish ladies I’ve probably mentioned in this blog before, standing in front me. Met them at an internet cafe in Bali at 3am in December, then again in Bangkok and now they are yelling out “ROBERTO” in Vang Vieng, Laos. They are like why are you walking around with a beer and a laptop, I said good question.

Drop off the laptop and I’m sitting there on my bed looking at the fan, looking at my bed, looking at my beer, looking at while clenching my stomach. Repeat x 3.

Finally grab the beer and with a skip in my step charge down a flight of stairs, I’m on the main drag. Run into this couple from the UK I met in Luang Prabang, shoot the sh!t and begin finding out about this place. First there are so many women here it’s nuts.  It’s also not like packaged tourist ladies who carry medical kits in there emasculated man’s murses while chatting about ovaltine and their latest burlap bargain, no sir. The guy with them needs to carry a murse because he has no pockets in his orange fisherman pants, haha.

I digress, once more.

Long story short this place is great for a gregarious yet at times nefarious gent like myself. I was going to go home when this crazy blonde lady I had chatted with earlier told me she was bored, I said I’m going to look for a party, she said where, I said I have an idea where and we can ask directions as we go, she said sure. Ever given someone a “Cheers” while walking with a 40 and the bottom of one of the 40′s drop out? It happened last night, so clean, so weird, so random.

 If you walk down towards the Mekong there are bars that sell whiskey buckets for 5000K that’s less than a dollar people. I was going to “boast” while raising a toast about my score when I told a girl and she said she got hers free, wtf!? Free buckets, wow.  If you hang out at the “Rap City” area long enough they’ll just give you free shots as well. I remember taking a shot and being like “What have I gotten myself into here” as previously it was just a leisurely beer exploring a new town.

Few random keywords to describe the evening, reggae bar, rap city the basement, techno so hard it would give anyone over 47.5 years of age an aneurysm except this one old dude who seemed to love it,  partying with a Lady Gaga and Tiger Wood’s Wife look a likes, limbo with fire, no curfew, random crazy people from aound the world, buckets, free shots, Mekong river, super chill and even cheaper than chill if that’s possible. I spent like hmmm almost nothing last night.

Finally, if you have an ipod touch or iphone, those alarms are great, it woke me up from a deep sleep. In the dream it’s like there was an air raid, if you have one of these things you know how the alarm sounds, yes? After that this guy beneath my window was literally smashing a massive piece of sheet metal with a hammer or massive log at 9am for about 30 minutes.

Now it’s 10:45, I’m going to go find an English breakfast somewhere.  Having to be in Bangkok on the 15th sucks but I’ll just suck it up. I’m mentioning this because I need to GET OUT of this town like tomorrow or the next day latest. What’s good what’s bad? I could see myself getting stuck here, I met some people who work here now and told you yesterday about my friend who worked here.

Ok I’ll fill you in, you get free accomodations, free meals(I think but food is cheap) you basically just live at a bar each night as there are many jobs. IF I did a job like this, I’d be a promoter. I hate “taking care of business” but I love getting business. Either way if you are looking to get lost in the world for a while, one of these jobs could be for you. No degree or previous experience required.

Let’s get one thing straight, I’m going to go tube the sh~7 out of that Mekong today, I think it’s the Mekong, whatever. Zip lines, swing ropes, do it all. Just one word of caution: If you’re going to do these things, do them first then get “going”, don’t be that “end of the day guy” who loses his grip on reality and thinks it’s a good idea. This same guy then simultaneously loses his physical grip and ends up mangled in the thick mud of the mighty Mekong. Don’t be that guy or gal.

Tips hat,

P.S: If you’re ever out alone, in a strange town… When you go into a bar go talk to the people you’d like to spend time with in the bar, what’s the worst that can happen? They give you a “get lost vibe”? If you don’t do that, you’ll end up just hanging out with the “I’ll talk to anyone crew” and they are the ones that talk about nothing as the only thing they, you and the rest of the crew have in common is that you’re all kinda boring. Got it? Good.

That’s a good tasting steak right there, covered in mushrooms and gravy, price? Not so bad, 30,000Kip ($1US = 8,400K). Slurp, that’s also a delicious coke. Why the $^%^ am I making a deal out of what I’m eating? Try I’ve had food poisoining last few days. I’m a mind over matter kinda guy so I just kept on my usual routine but this time, paid the consequences.

6 hours in a packed minivan and being scared to eat anything, you get to a place like this and you look down and say “stomach, love it or make me relive it, suck it up, this is going down”. Delicious.

I digress.

Woke up early well not really woke up, more like was woken up with the worst stomach I’ve had in 4 months in Asia all night. What a horrible night last night was.

I digress, once more.

Aight, so I’m in Vang Vieng or something like that, it’s about ~200KM from Luang Prabang but takes you ~6hours + to get there, it’s all up and over some of the sickest mountains I’ve ever seen, besides the Rockies of course. This was different though and we went through many small villages.

I want to take a minute to say that anyone back home or anywhere in the West who says “FML, my life sucks”, get a grip, quit being a total over-dramatic loser. You have it soo good, I have it sooo good, we all have it soo good. If I could have it my way, we’d cut some of those mooches off welfare but apart from that, I’m cool with the way things are run.

Here? It’s a different way of life and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. You see kids running around the streets on the tops of mountains carrying sticks and buckets full of water in front of straw huts. Even if kid “A” wanted to be something, how? What opportunities? It’s odd how so many people from the more developed world make these ficticious barriers saying oh if only x, I could have y, why? My nurse friend who works in one of these villages said most people are actually very sick compared to North America. Worms, mumps, fleas and that’s the start of it.

The door is already open for you, but you’re getting held up on the doorman not greeting you with a smile!? Who the #!#$ do you think you are? Who cares, just go to the party. These people, they aren’t even near the door, it’s not open and there is no one that would give them a lift even if they had the coin. It’s like this almost all over the world, the more you see it, the more you realize it, the weirder it feels.

Ok, I’m in Vang Vieng  aka the “Tubing on the River”. This place is situated in this massive valley with some of the dopest backdrops ever. If i was some crazed and eccentric writer, I’d move here and go into the hills with 3 mules carrying supplies from Tom’s Whisky shop and fist fulls of deet, or something like that.

So far this place kinda feels like Koh Phangan, too many people that want to party. With too many partiers, too many flies. Not sure if that makes sense to you but it should, got it? Good. It’s like besides going to get loaded in a river in Loas, there is no point to be here. I’m glad I rolled the dice and stayed as long as I did in Luang Prabang, what a place!!

Tomorrow, I’ll do that tubing bs, even if it’s just so if someone is like oh you went to Laos, did you go tubing???! I’ll be like yeah, it was ok.

A good friend of mine on this trip used to work here, he said forget the tubes, just show up at the top bar with a bathing suit and a smile. Then swim to the other bars as they are a stone throw away. There are zip lines, swing ropes, everything you need to get mangled in a developing country. I’ve seen lots of dudes with arm braces etc. Also heard some larger horror stories. Also tubes cost like $10US and everyone just “borrows” everyone elses, if you don’t get back by 6PM you lose your “deposit”. It’s still chump change but if you can get a room like I just did for ~$4.75US with private bahtroom and hot shower… Yeah you’re getting where I’m going.

Right now I’ve let this computer charge enough, I’m off to that internet cafe to see if that lovely lady from London I met is still there. She gave me a hat tip on the free wifi and looks nice for a chat and a smoke type thing.

First thoughts, I’m glad I stayed as long as I did in Luang Prabang. LP is like a TIME WARP. You’re like what year are we, where are we? Are we in 1950, 1850, 2000? Are we in Asia, France? What the!? I was sad to leave Luang Prabang, one of my favorite stops. It’s a world heritage site because it used to be a city of monks. I didn’t do it justice, I was so lazy, crap bloggeries, boo. I also have many photos that I’ll do something with, one day, maybe? Suffice to say, Luang Prabang, a city I didn’t even know existed until I got to the Laos border has become one of my favorite stops on this trip. It’s like no where I’d ever been before.

Tips hat,

P.S: I prepared some photos and like a sucker, the FTP sucks here. As a result, no photos, which sucks because the ride through the mountains as awesome. Am I getting old? Saying rides through places are great due to breath taking scenery and stuff!? What have I become, sigh.

P.P.S: Speaking of Koh Phangan, this lady I’m now talking with from London, she got bottled on New years, some guy threw a bottle in the air, hit her in the face, lip stitches and had to fix some teeth. I’m just going to say it, I have no love for Koh Phangan and the full moon party was crazy but over hyped.

P.P.P.S: Some tourists are so cheap and rude I want to scream at them. This lady is arguing with a guy over the price of a coke. She says she can buy elsewhere for 5000kip or 50 cents, he wants 6,000k but she has failed to realize this is a restaurant. I can’t imagine being in any type of relationship even as friends with someone THAT CHEAP. If you come to a developing country don’t be that person, just don’t.

I don’t really want to leave, whenever I go back into my room, I just want to pass out or enjoy it. The room reminds me of a room back home, it’s really nice. Hardwood everywhere, great mattresses, fun people around. I’m off to catch a bus from Luang Prabang to Vang Vieng.

At night the dogs here can be creeps, this m angy mutt started stepping to me last night, I took out my 2L water bottle and swung for the fences, a true warning shot. The dog went back then started stalking me with a friend, it came closer and I almost connected with it’s face. This is a dog that looks like it’s left leg got ran over and was always fighting other dogs. I figure it’s a sign to leave, look what happened last time in Bangkok.

On that topic, having a fixed date that you have to leave makes travel so less enjoyable. I mean, I should be in Bangkok for final shot, I don’t want to go, the whole trip is getting screwed. Here I am on a leisurely jaunt through Laos then could of gone to Cambodia. Now I”m upposed to be this ridiculous distance in the wrong direcction for a date.

I realize how lucky myself and others are on “no time frame trips”. Time frames put salt in your game so to speak. It feels like my trip ends on the 15th. Will I ever make it back to Laos? Who knows, it’s a shame as this place is great and the visa is the priciest around especially for Canadians.

Oh well, who knows what will come from a trip to Bangkok *I have a few ideas*. The bus to Vien Veng from Luang Prabang is ~4-5 hours and leaves at ~9AM for 110,000Kip or ~$15. I never bothered looking into local transport, I’ve just been relaxing here. Come to think of it, that sounds pricey.
Side note, beware of tom’s whisky. This stuff will turn your stomach from a mean guard dog to a small puppy and you”ll be hurting, trust me.

Tips hat,