Travel Talk

French Wine, Castles & Hotel N@zi

Greetings Debutantes, Derelicts and Deadbeats alike,

We have some EXTREMELY important matters to discuss of utmost importance, indeed we do. What the h3ll is going on with the EURO and how come MORE of my friends aren’t coming over here to dance on the graves of the Europeans banks by ways of having the holiday of their lives!? What are you going to wait until the EURO is back to 1.45 to come? It’s 1.19 now and I suspect going lower, INDEED I DO!

So yeah, my blogging has suffered lately and I’d like to apologize, not to you but to myself. I write this so I’ll know what happened and so that random dude who I WAS before I left will be able to follow this daily from work, a space ship, some rats nest in Cambodia, whatever, you follow? Or of course some lovely lady living anywhere and doing anything, obviously. If I wrote this for the internet, I’d of quit ages ago like 98% of blogs that aren’t an autotelic activity for the author.

France is a funny place, they close down on Monday’s and everything every other day is closed from 12-2PM for lunch. If you were a worker, it would be “Sweet” here, if you’re basically living the life of a semi retired geriatric who wakes up at 11am, it’s horrible, you can’t do anything.

I digress.

We bounced from Ronce-Les-Baines yesterday and ended up in the Saumur area where we bought egregious quantities of wine, I have a photo of me pushing ~100L but of course, no camera, I have a memory card but of COURSE no card reader. Ok, you’re still with us? Good, yesterday was interesting.

So we’re cruising, checking out castles, eating baguettes and all that jazz. Castles are quite cool and I can see why the French peasants revolted and said “OFF WITH YOUR HEADS”, I mean there are so many massive castles, after a while I’d be like “Screw this, let’s get ours” and that is what they did.

I digress once more.

So my cousin wants to show me this one castle and we drive all over the map to find it, get there it just closed. Most of the hotels are booked and like 120E which frankly, if I was on a romantic trip with a lady I loved would be no problem but when you’re splitting a room with your cousin, eh… Really?

So we look around and I run into this one place that is slightly less “nice” to put it nicely and they want 49E. My cousin, who has never stayed anywhere even remotely shady was like “this place gives me the creeps and I’m not staying there”. Of course I convince him to just “have a look”. Also the beds were like pushed together, awkward family moment anyone?

So on the way out I tell the lady that since it’s 8PM, she has half a hotel open and I’m with my cousin, could we have a slightly bigger room for the same price. I asked them and we left, thought nothing of it…

Go to another place, they jerk you around. FIRST TIME in 9 months I’ve felt kinda like “what are you doing here, poor 20 something year old whatever you are” and people being like sorry no room, whatever. I forgot what it was like living in a superficial city filled with people who have brains made of Styrofoam and big eyes for played out brand name clothing… Basically I didn’t have some wing tipped shoes or an oxford or something so they thought I was some broke @$$ backpacker, SNOBS!

Anyways, we go back to the weak hotel and this big portly lady with a gapy / faded maroon cardigan is sitting there. I remember being hungry and noting that she had more rolls than the baker, anyways she said “No rooms for you”. I said “pardon?” She said “I’m the owner, the prices are NOT negotiable and I can do what I want, NO ROOM FOR YOU!!!!!” Wow, I just realized, I met the hotel room N@zi, she was not kind. The place was damp and the only thing colder than the hospitality was the the indoor temp. It was “Hostel Du Roy” near Chenonceaux Castle, France. 2 big thumbs down for this barely 2 star hotel.

Turns out we didn’t check out the castle below but that’s cool, I’m not a things or landmark person, I’m a people person. I want to meet interesting people from around the world to expand my knowledge, not walk into every old relic.

Anyways we can’t find a place, everywhere is booked, getting tired, irritable you know and find a place in Blois, ended up at this super nice hotel for roughly the same price and had a wonderful meal. My cousin just left and now I’m back on my own. It was great to see family again but my blogging was suffering, ha.

At the meal we ran into some great people, including guys who work for the trains, they explained much. Some of them thought I was actually francaphone and they called me their “Cousin” because I was from Quebec. I told them I wasn’t but they wouldn’t believe me so I dropped it. I had more fun at that dinner then I would of at the castle, who knows what is good or bad? Everything works out how it should, if you let it. That said, when I find out the “good” in cracking my forehead on some rural road in Vietnam, I’ll be sure to fill you in. I have a feeling it’s part of a larger play that I’m currently not conscious of, just yet.

Totally unrelated, coffee is for cretins. You know it increases beta brain waves right? Beta waves are used for like mopping a floor, filling out routine tps reports or something of that nature. Anything hitting into your creative faculty works on Alpha. Anyways, had a coffee and now writing seems like a chore, I’d much rather vacuum my room or something of that nature. Not sure why people spend so much to make their hands sweat and dumb themselves down, that said for less than the price of a coffee, you could join the PPT?

I’m off to Andorra to buy electronics, maybe even cop an iPhone if the opportunity presents itself. Basically if the weather is UNDER 25 degrees, it’s uncivilized so I’m going South.  Furthermore, without photos this blog is about 53.27% as interesting. When I search for images, I’m getting to the point where I have better ones, indeud.

I have a day of riding the rail, go have some fun, will ya? If you’re even remotely bored, go talk to whoever you’d like in your life, if nothing happens you’re back to square one, nothing ventured nothing gained my friends. Top down, top down, not bottom up, yes?

Life is a trip, don’t get left at the station.

tips hat,

P.S: The French castles are above are Chinon, Saumur and Chenonceaux.

P.P.S: Search Du Jour : “Eating King Cobra in Vietnam

P.whatever.s: Someone please remind me in the future to talk about troglodytes, we got lost and ended up at a troglodyte village, seriously, it was very troglodylic. Having used the term “troglodyte” so many times, it was immensely enjoyable.

Leave a Reply